Wednesday, June 3, 2009

I'm going to hell, yaaaay!

So yesterday at work, this middle aged, overweight, highly effeminate creepy man came in and ordered a cherry, blueberry, strawberry and orange smoothie. I couldn't tell if he was gay or mentally off, it was really hard to tell. Well, he sat down and started drinking his smoothie saying how delicious it was continually, then asking a bunch of odd questions. Asking me how old I thought he was, how old I was etc. etc. He starts to tell me all these stories of himself growing up for about 20 minutes. Then the fun stuff came.

I was studying up on compassion for a message I want to speak that morning, about how we have arguments in our heads before we actually go out and act. So, me trying to follow my own lesson, I ask if he goes to church anywhere. He says "Oh I haven't been recently but I go to the blablabla church down such and such road allllll the way across the street from blabla(way too much information.)" So I go, oh that's cool man, we just started a church about 5 months ago, so it'd be cool if you want to check us out. While I was saying this he was snarling his nose and not looking me in the eye. Then he goes "you're probably a trinitist." I respond... "what?" "You believe in the trinity, and that's wrong. the only time they mention the trinity in the bible is after the disciples died. The only way you get to heaven is through the holy ghost and baptism."

Now, if you guys know me, I don't mind discussion about a subject, but when it turns into a blatant pissing contest, with me not even trying to piss back, I get extremely agitated.
He goes on about this literally for an hour, with me asking different questions to prove my point, and he's the only one talking pretty much. After that hour, and him repeating himself, I say "Sir, I don't mind discussion, and I don't want to disrespect you, but you're ramming your point in to my throat and it's getting a little annoying, let's agree to disagree" He goes "It's not a point, it's the BIBLE." Then starts rambling some more and I interrupt him, "Sir, you're about to make me be disrespectful, I don't mind you trying to share your points, but you're not sharing it in a loving way at all, its very rude." So he backs off and sits down.

After that a few customers came in and out, and then he started just talking about the old testament and different facts about it, like how the dinosaur was mentioned in the bible and we just talked about random facts. It turned out fine, but holy crap! He came in at 2:30 and left at 5:00, and the only reason he left is because Tim felt bad for me and drove him home (thank you, Tim.)

I could write about 5 more paragraphs of all the stuff he was saying and pretty much his entire life story, but I won't bore you with that.

It's just funny how God shows you things right as you're studying about them.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Oh the lessons to be learned

When I was little, my mom would only let me have one Fruit Roll-up a day. And by golly, I've always dreamed of the day that I could have more than one. So dadgummit, I bought a box of them tonight and I feel like I'm about to poo and vomit at the same time.

So kids, listen to your parents.